Constructor: Joel Fagliano
Relative Difficulty: Medium
Word of the Day: LLAMA
The llama (/ˈlɑːmə/; Spanish: [ˈʝama] locally: [ˈʎama] or [ˈʒama]) (Lama glama) is a domesticated South American camelid, widely used as a meat and pack animal by Andean cultures since the Pre-Columbian era.
The height of a full-grown, full-size llama is 1.7 to 1.8 m (5.6 to 5.9 ft) tall at the top of the head, and can weigh between 130 and 200 kg (290 and 440 lb). At birth, a baby llama (called a cria) can weigh between 9 and 14 kg (20 and 31 lb). Llamas typically live for 15 to 25 years, with some individuals surviving 30 years or more. (Wikipedia)
Ok puzzle, not great but not the worst, blah blah blah Star Trek reference blah blah West Wing clip blah picture of a guy in a hoagie costume with tenuously-puzzle-related meme text, signed whomever. No, for serious, this puzzle is probably not the worst atrocity yet created by man, as far as I can tell. Though I am just one man, possessed of limited faculties, so who knows? I could be overlooking key details here, people.
One thing I am not overlooking is how disappointing a show Unbreakable KIMMY Schmidt is [7A: Netflix's Unbreakable _____ Schmidt]. Man, was that thing a letdown! Huge 30 Rock fan here, but I don't get what the big deal is with this show: It's basically just one running gag over and over, populated with the two most tiresome characters from Fey's previous show. It's not that Jane "I only portray narcissists" Krakowski and Tituss "why the hell are there two S's in my first name" Burgess are bad exactly; they're good at playing the characters they're playing. it's just that they've been playing EXACTLY THE SAME CHARACTERS for the last several years, so their existence on this supposedly original show is utterly baffling.
And Ellie Kemper is good bordering on great, like maybe as good as that one distant relative of hers I used to know in real life, but the thing is she isn't give much of anything to work with. The whole thing actually sounds like a really interesting premise for a show, in that it deals with really dark subject matter in a light comedic way, but the flatness of the ancillary characters and the stereotypical sitcommy story-lines keeps it from going anywhere compelling. Oh, also Jeff Richmond's music is completely insipid. I suspect nepotism (he's married to Fey). NAY I say, what a shitty piece of television [5D: Opposite of aye]. Probably it would be a much better show if there was a LLAMA in it [6A: Alpaca cousin]. There isn't a llama in it, is there? I've only watched two episodes.
Unlike second-rate sitcoms, I appreciate MELON in pretty much any context [4A: Honeydew or cantaloupe]. Mostly cantaloupe. What is it with honeydews, amiright??? It's like, basically the worst sometimes. At least it's kosher though, so you can get it at DELIS [1D: Shops that can be kosher]. That clue's a little weird isn't it? Not only is it the case that any shop can technically be kosher, but aren't delis sort of by definition kosher? So the phrasing "can" is perhaps inartful.
There isn't anything else worth talking about in this puzzle. Goodbye.
Signed, Jonathan Gibson, narcissistic nepotist of CrossWorld